Endigar 549 ~ Loved Back to Recovery

From Daily Reflections 18 September;

Our whole treasured philosophy of self-sufficiency had to be cast aside. This had not been done with old-fashioned willpower; it was instead a matter of developing the willingness to accept these new facts of living. We neither ran nor fought. But accept we did. And then we were free.   (Best of the Grapevine, Vol. I, page 198)

I can be free of my old enslaving self. After a while I recognize, and believe in, the good within myself. I see that I have been loved back to recovery by my Higher Power, who envelops me. My Higher Power becomes that source of love and strength that is performing a continuing miracle in me. I am sober . . . and I am grateful.

END OF QUOTE

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When I hear that a person learned to give up “self-sufficiency,”  I imagine a human being that has had his bones liquefied and extracted, while the resulting jelly fish man is held on life-support in a spiritual hospital of some sort.  Flopping about in his state of permanent repose he spouts off about acceptance.  This vision was not helpful for my own recovery.

So I studied and realized the Big Book is pointing out the damning effects of isolated selfishness and not counseling us to be rid of the self-preservation  that helped us walk in the rooms of recovery.  The treasured philosophy that I am cursed with is isolated self-sufficiency.  This is the old enslaver of my soul, cutting me off from my life giving Source.

Over time, my self-preservation would be nursed into self-appreciation when I see that there is good in me.  One day at a time, self-appreciation manifested in the freedom of self-love.  This transformation comes from being able to connect to others that have mine and their own best interest at heart, and by connecting with the Infinite One, the God of my Understanding (Gomu).   In nature, the Lone Wolf is a miserable and desperate creature.

“For the strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack.”  ~ The Law for the Wolves by Rudyard Kipling.